Top 10 Female Characters Who You Should Hate

Hello, and welcome to another week of top 10 in fandom. I hoped that you enjoyed the last week’s list, even if you didn’t agree with the topic at hand.

This week’s topic is the top 10 (YES 10!!!) female characters who you should hate. Hate may be a strong word, but in the world of fan fiction, these women are so bad that you can’t help but hate them. (Plus, if we can’t hate male and females equally, then something’s wrong with the universe)

And the top 10 background female characters who you should hate (and the punishments they should suffer) are as follows:

10. Tammy Brownstone: she’s the sister of the boy who kicks Jacquel Rassenworth around, and yet, she doesn’t stop Sereno or help Jacquel! Off with her head!!!

9. Ginny Weasley: She spent an entire book series chasing after a boy who really shouldn’t have survived a killing curse and wants to be his wife. She’s sick and she needs to be locked away in a padded room and never released.

8. The Yewbeam Women: Charlie’s grandmother and aunts just love to cause trouble for everyone. They really need to see what the inside of a prison cell looks like.

7. Arya (NOT Arya Stark): I just couldn’t stand that Arwen wannabe (even Nasuada is much better than her)! She rejected Eragon, which was something that I just could never forgive her for that. She should have been killed off, and I’m not kidding.

5. Nelena Luvannokitch: Just because she’s short doesn’t give her the right to go around picking on anyone. Plus, telling Jacquelyn to “go away and die” is just flat-out bullying. I say SHE needs to go away and die! (we’ll deal with that in a later post)

4. Hermione Granger: as much as everyone loves her, I don’t. She’s rude, cruel, and arrogant; she always raises her hand in class (and doesn’t give others a chance to speak) and she nags Harry and Ron to death. Her punishment is simple: introduce someone smarter than her and see what happens.

3. Rosalie Hale: I found her “I’ve wanted to just be human” vibe to be a bit tiring. All I seem to hear from her is “oh boo-hoo, I never got to live a human life”. Shut up, build a bridge, and get over it! Her punishment is to be sentenced to some aggressive counseling courtesy of Dr. Phil.

2. Mona Vanderwhal: I just don’t like her at all; she’s iffy and conniving and exists only to cause trouble for the girls. She should have stayed dead like in the books. Punishment is for her to be locked up and NEVER released!

1. Cersei Lannister: Hmmm…sleeping with your brother, having three bad kids, cuckolding the king, allowing Sean Bean to die, generally being an evil little…witch. Yeah, that’s Cersei for you! She gives queens everywhere a bad name with her antics, plus, she’s just making women ashamed to be women. The punishment for her is death by dragon, courtesy of Danaerys Targaryen.

Well, that’s all for this list. If you find yourself disagreeing with any of the above items for any reason, then let me know in the comments. See you next week for more Top 10 in Fandom!

Strange Things Happen at Bone Academy Chapter 5

At Lady Arabeth’s place, Jacquelyn was a bit shocked at what she had wrought.

She had turned a ring that she was wearing into a box and also had performed her first memory charm. By removing the memory of when she had first met Harry Potter, she had eliminated scores of other memories, memories that followed the meeting with him.
But was it the right thing to do, she asked herself.

On one hand, it was the logical thing to do. By removing any memories that she had of Harry Potter, she had effectively removed herself from the problem of having to deal with Harry Potter and Albus Dumbledore.

But on the other hand, was it right for her to remove the memories of having met her other friends?

“Not unless I removed their memor—wait,” she cried out.

“Yes,” said Lady Arabeth.

“Is it possible to remove yourself from a certain person’s memories?” Jacquelyn cried out. She could have slapped herself for not thinking about that earlier.

“Indeed you can,” said Lady Arabeth. She handed the book to the girl and said, “On this page, write down the names of those you wish to remove yourself from. Be forewarned, as you write the person’s name down, all their memories of you will vanish. Every single picture they have of you will be altered.”

Jacquelyn took the book and began writing. She decided now to make the spell irreversible, just in case she weakened later on in life. As far as she knew, she certainly was done living as a wizard.

—–

Charlie frowned as he laid on the couch in the living room. He refused to go near his bedroom, not how he had spoken to Manfred and certainly not the way he had reacted. What person acts like this, he thought to himself.

Certainly someone like Manfred Bloor, that’s who.

Charlie really didn’t want to be in the house right now, so he forced himself up and went outside. The weather had changed; it was dark and stormy. Not exactly the kind of weather to go walking in.

Manfred saw him and said, “Look, Charlie, we really need to talk.”

“Oh, so now you want to talk,” Charlie snapped at him. “Excuse me, but I seem to recall you saying that you’re not a sad sappy little boy. So no, we won’t be talking.”

“Oh, we will be talking, Charlie Bone,” Manfred snapped at him. We will be talking, that’s for sure.”

Charlie tried to walk away, but Manfred seized him and dragged him back towards his house and straight to his room. He tossed Charlie onto his bed and locked the door, saying, “You won’t be going anywhere until we’ve had our talk. Don’t you dare try to wiggle your way out of this one!”

Charlie frowned and crossed his arms in anger. This was going to take a while.

—–

Jacquelyn frowned as she stared at the list of names that she had written down: Harry Potter. Ron Weasley. Hermione Granger. Neville LongbottomRemus Lupin. She shook her head, knowing that when she wrote their names, all memories that they had of her would forever vanish.

She comtemplated writing down Albus Dumbledore, but recanted. He would have to answer for his crimes of killing the Ulrich family. For some reason, however, she couldn’t bring herself to write down the name Magnus Kroger; she had known him BEFORE they attended Hogwarts and it would seem cruel of her to force him to forget her.

When she had finished with the list of names, Jacquelyn set down the pen. Lady Arabeth saw the names and shook her head, saying, “Such a shame they must forget about you. But why must they never remember you?”

“Their loyalty was to a man who killed my family,” said Jacquelyn. “But in writing myself out of their lives, they will believe that I never existed and perhaps Albus Dumbledore will get the justice that he deserves. If they forget me, then maybe they could recall someone else who was in my shoes. The human mind can create false memories, if that is true.”

“It is decidedly so,” said Lady Arabeth, “but what of your own name?” Jacquelyn stared at her. “You may have written yourself out of their lives, but if you were to meet them, they could somehow recall you. We can’t have that, or can we?”

“We’ve already spoken about that,” said Jason, who was still in the room. “We both agreed that she should not be using her name, but she will use the name Katelyn.”

“Indeed,” said Lady Arabeth. “There is a call for a missing girl, aged 13, who is blond with green eyes. We must alter her appearance immediately.

“We shall,” said Jason. “What did you have in mind?”

“My mother had blond hair, but she hated it,” said Jacquelyn. “She was always dyeing it black.”

“Maybe black hair isn’t so bad,” said Lady Arabeth. “While we’re at it, we shall change your eyes to a turquoise color and give you a lighter complexion. We must do this now or else it’ll be too late.”

Jacquelyn nodded. She knew that she was on her way to freedom, but there seemed to be a nagging question on her mind: was she doing the right thing by essentially destroying her own life in pursuit of escaping from Dumbledore and Harry? What about Nichollo? What would he say if he knew of what she was doing?

Charlie Bone/Harry Potter Rewrite Part 1

Jacquel in Charlie Bone

Jacquel in Charlie Bone (Photo credit: claireviolet82)

OK, this is the first part of the fan fiction revision that I have told you that I was doing. (I had started this on my regular website, but had to put on this blog)

Anyway, the story I’m rewriting is called Harry Potter & The Children of the Red King, which was one of the first stories that I wrote on FanFiction.Net. In it, Harry is upset after the events of “Order of the Phoenix“, so he runs away and ends up going to Bloor‘s Academy. While he is there, he meets Charlie Bone, who takes him on yet another adventure.

Well, I’m not going to waste any time, so I’m going to jump on in with the beginning:

Harry was upset. Very upset. He still couldn’t believe that Sirius was gone. But is Sirius really dead, he thought to himself or am I just imagining things?

On his way home from Hogwarts, Harry found himself apologizing repeatedly to Julia Black. She had been recently revealed as the daughter of Sirius Black. Many people in the wizarding world were shocked. Sirius Black, the wizard who many believed was falsely accused of killing 13 people with a single curse and spent 12 years in Azkaban until he escaped, had been raising a daughter for nearly 16 years. Also shocking was the fact that Sirius had once been married to Jacobine Kalligan, who was the younger sister of Shannon Morgan and Sean Michael. All three had come from the controversial Trichenberg family. The Trichenberg/Black marriage didn’t last because the next year, Jacobine had died when Julia was born. Sirius raised his daughter alone.

“For the last time, Harry, stop apologizing to me,” said Julia for the umpteenth time. She, Harry, Ron, and Hermione had been at this for a while now. “Sirius was my father.”

“But he was my godfather,” Harry shot back. “He was supposed to be protecting me!”

“And he did,” said Ron. “He saved you from Bellatrix Lestrange.”

“Ooooooooooh, the nerve of that woman,” Julia snapped. “I never thought that I’d say this, but I have a score to settle with her!”

“And I’m very sure that you’ll beat her,” said Hermione.

When the train pulled into the station, Harry said goodbye to Ron, Hermione, Julia, and Jacquel, and waited for his uncle. Several minutes passed and Vernon didn’t show up. “Typically Vernon,” Harry muttered to himself. “He doesn’t even care about me at all. Why do I even bother?” Soon, he got up and walked away.

I just can’t do this anymore, Harry thought to himself as he walked around the train station. I just can’t be the hero and watch everyone around me die. He sighed and watched as people got on the trains, or got off them. Then Harry suddenly got an idea. He would run away and never return. If I can’t live a normal life here, he mused, then perhaps I can go find someplace else to go and start over. I just might be able to live a normal life.

Harry smiled as he boarded a train bound for a little-known city. But little did he know that he was about to embark on another adventure…

And now the rewritten version:

Harry was upset. Very upset. He still couldn’t believe that Sirius was gone. He can’t be dead, he muttered to himself. He just can’t be dead! But Little did he know that that was the truth. Sirius Black was truly dead.

He then remembered the events that led to this point:

The fight raged in the Department of Mysteries.

Harry Potter found himself dodging curses from Lucius Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange as he struggled to protect the prophecy from them. The others had taken off, with Jacquel Romanov and Magnus Kroger leading two Death Eaters on a wild goose chase. Ron WeasleyHermione Granger, Neville Longbottom, and Ginny Weasley were on the other side of the place.

Luna Lovegood found them and they and Harry ran until they reached a room where the veil was.

Jacquel said, “I really think this wasn’t a good idea.”

“What wasn’t good about it?” said Harry. “Voldemort was torturing Sirius in my vision. I had to go save him.”

“Well, you better have a good plan,” Magnus growled at him.

“Fine,” said Harry. “OK, here’s what we do: Ron, you throw chess pieces at Lucius and call him all sorts of nasty names; Hermione, you throw a book at Bellatrix Lestrange…”

Neville jumped in by saying, “Uh, Harry, I believe that’s my job…”

“Uh, right, Neville,” said Harry. “And as for you, Jacquel…well, you’re next to useless unless you get yourself captured by Fenrir Greyback and then I can go rescue you.”

“Harry, you idiot!” Jacquel cried out in anger. “Are you taking my character and completely remaking it to create “pointless drama” that is completely unnecessary?”

“Well,” said Hermione, “everyone wants to see you as the beautiful girl everyone loves and not be hated for no reason.”

Jacquel stared at all her friends, not believing a word that she was hearing. It seemed that her whole life, people had hated her for no reason. She didn’t seem to mind as a child, but she was nearly 16 years old and quite frankly, she was tired of that crap that she was being handed.

The next words she said would forever change the lives of not only her, but her friends as well: “OK, that’s it! I will NOT be bowing down to no Mary-Sueism! I quit this joint! We are all broken up!”

“What?” cried Ron. “But why?”

“Because I’m tired of the crap that I was being handed over the years, mainly by Dumbledore,” Jacquel snapped. “And you guys just are a bunch of stupid idiots who believe anything HE tells you! I can’t do this anymore!”

“Jacquel, please…” Hermione begged.

“No!” Jacquel snapped. “You wouldn’t believe all the crap that I put up with for all these years, crap about my family that are LIES! I even had to go along with Harry’s schemes and crap.” Harry stared at her with wide green eyes. “And let me tell you something about that…NOT BLOODY PLEASANT!”

Before they knew it, the Death Eaters had burst into the room, along with Sirius Black and several members of the Order of the Phoenix. “I’ll deal with this later,” Jacquel said as she brandished her wand and lunged at Fenrir Greyback.

The others soon followed suit and another big fight raged on. This time, Harry and Sirius were up against Lucius and Bellatrix as the mini duels that surrounded them quickly turned into a huge fight. In a fight with a Death Eater, Jacquel’s wand was cracked clear across the middle; but the spell hadn’t harmed her at all.

“Jacquel!” Harry cried out and tried to assist her, but the Death Eater sent a powerful blast, which imploded Jacquel’s wand and sent her flying across the room, knocking Lucius unconscious. Bellatrix took this opportunity to zap Sirius, who was standing right in front of the veil.

“What are you gonna do?” he taunted. “Zap me?”

“With pleasure,” Bellatrix laughed as she sent a powerful blast that sent Sirius flying through the veil.
Harry turned and gasped as he watched Sirius fall through the veil. He still couldn’t believe that his godfather was gone. He couldn’t believe that Sirius was gone and his last chance at having a family was now gone. He would have to go back to the hated Dursleys.

On his way home from Hogwarts, Harry found himself not speaking to any of his friends. He blamed himself for putting them all in danger. After Sirius’s death, his daughter Julia grew angry with him, blaming him for killing her father. Harry knew that she would never forgive him for destroying the only chance that the Black family could reunite.

“For the last time, Harry, stop apologizing to me,” said Julia for the umpteenth time. She, Harry, Ron, and Hermione had been at this for a while now. “Sirius was my father and you let him die. No amount of apologies will ever make me forgive you for your evil deeds.”

“But he was my godfather,” Harry shot back. “He was supposed to be protecting me!”

“And he did,” said Ron. “He saved you from Bellatrix Lestrange.”

“And that’s another thing I have beef with you over,” Julia snapped. “I may have a score to settle with her, and believe me I do, but YOU…” (she points to Harry) “…are the prime reason why Bellatrix killed my father. I never thought I’d say this, but I wish that she’d kill you and not him! Maybe with you out of the way, we can finally have some peace in this realm!”

At this, Harry was shocked. Julia Black wanted him dead? He couldn’t blame her, seeing as practically everyone and their best friend had treated him like used chewing gum after the knowledgeable Beterli Samson spread a rumor that claimed that Harry Potter himself had killed Cedric Diggory, a rumor that Harry had denied.

Well, sad to say, but it seemed that overnight, he had gone from Boy-Who-Lived to “the Next Dark Lord”. Harry vehemently refused to go down that road; his uncle and aunt would have a fit if he did. And even then, Ron, Hermione, and Jacquel had stuck by him, not wanting to end their friendship with him.

But now, no one was talking to him anymore; not even Jacquel could look him in the eye. It was just like everyone had forgotten about him and his exploits had ever happened.

When the train pulled into the station, Harry sat on a nearby bench and waited for his uncle. He didn’t say anything to anyone. Several minutes passed and Vernon didn’t show up. “Typically Vernon,” Harry muttered to himself. “He doesn’t even care about me at all. Why do I even bother?” Soon, he got up and walked away.

He thought about what Julia had said to him: “Maybe with you out of the way, we can finally have some peace!” He wondered if she was right. Would the wizarding world be able to function without him in the picture?

I just can’t do this anymore, Harry thought to himself as he walked around the train station. I just can’t be the hero and watch everyone around me die. I also can’t have people bashing me because of one person’s death. This isn’t the way that my life should be going. He sighed and watched as people boarded and/or got off the trains. Neither of them noticed him and if they did, they didn’t say anything to him.

Then Harry suddenly got an idea. He would run away and never return. If I can’t live a normal life here, he mused, then perhaps I can go find someplace else to go and start over. I just might be able to live a normal life.

Harry smiled as he prepared to board a train bound for a little-known city. But little did he know that he was about to embark on another adventure…

So, what’s the difference between the two paragraphs?

Well, the first paragraph didn’t leave us with anything, just a tiny fragment of what happened to Sirius and why Harry decided to run away.

Yet the second paragraph gave us a glimpse into what happened to Sirius and how everyone seemed to treat Harry. The passage felt a bit more realistic (and did you think Julia would forgive Harry for her father’s death? I didn’t think so!) and the fact that not too many people want to be around Harry seems to cement the fact that maybe nobody really liked him at all, just his fame.

Thus we have the trope “maybe if I go away, everyone will be happy“.

So, if Harry did leave, would anyone really miss him? As for the rest of the story, we’ll just have to wait and see.

Look for the revised story on the upcoming blog, Fantasy Central.

FanFiction Trailer #5

An unthinkable tragedy…

A school forced to shut down…

A legacy tarnished…

In an alternative universe, a deranged student goes berserk and blows up Hogwarts. Harry Potter and Hermione Granger were killed, along with so many of the other students and teachers. Ron Weasley is deported to America, where he is placed with a foster family. Jacquel, however, must deal with a family legacy that is tarnished thanks to a man who had once dated her mother, Irina.

When the worst happens, can these two surviving friends hold onto their sanity as well as their lives?

March 15 Stories (Part 5)

Instead of the usual batch of stories that I usually toss out on Fridays, this week, I’m going over the stories that I began on March 15, 2010

  1. Molly Evans is now 13 years old and she must come to terms with her sad past. (ONGOING)
  2. When Sunny Baudelaire is old, she tells her grandchildren her sad life story. (ONGOING)
  3. Harry and Dudley must not only face a wizarding war, but an angry Ginny Weasley. (AVAILABLE; SEE ME IF YOU WANT THIS STORY!)
  4. Colin and Silas Bone and their cousins Elva, Peter, and Giselle Yewbeam must face the ghost of Maddy Du Bois. (ONGOING)
  5. A year after “The Old Traditional Story”, Charlie and the others leave Bloor‘s after a fight. (ONGOING)
  6. When Seamus is on his deathbed, his grandchildren fight for this fortune. (DEBATING)
  7. Artemis is now a married man with several children and an old man needs his help once again… (ONGOING)
  8. The Cullens play hosts to several stranded vampires. (ONGOING)
  9. The Volturi and Voldemort have an all-out battle. (ONGOING)
  10. The Millers discover Paul is alive and they confront Dumbledore. (ONGOING)
  11. Selena faces her angry mother as Jacquel prepares to do battle with the dark lord. (ONGOING)
  12. Michael Bone and his friends must deal with a strange new villain. (ONGOING)
  13. Dumbledore sends Jacquel, Sameth, and Saphira to the Volturi and ask them to eat the children. But the Volturi have better plans for them… (ONGOING)
  14. The Cullens attend Hogwarts (Bella and Jake included) and along comes a certain werewitch… (ONGOING)
  15. What if Ron was NOT a Weasley? He could be the son of two bad vampires. God help us all. (ONGOING)

I’ll be posting an update on these stories soon.

Characters in "The Life & Times of Teddy Lupin"

In my fan fiction novel “The Life & Times of Teddy Lupin“, Teddy Lupin goes off to Hogwarts as the godson of the famous Harry Potter. but alas, things aren’t what they appear to be.

And his friends are the following characters I made up:

Full name: Charlotte Fiona Thorpe
Nickname(s): Charlie
Date of birth: August 3, 1997
Place of birth: London, England
Parents: Charles and Tiarra Thorpe
Male or female: female
Magical origins? pureblood
House in Hogwarts: Hufflepuff
First featured in: Teddy Lupin & the Pilfered Progeny

Other facts: Charlie is the 23rd grandchild of Louis Thelonius Thorpe, a wizard who was banished to Canada because of his rumored involvement with Gellert Grindelwald. Her true origins are even more sinister than what we were given.

Full name: Timothy Ulrich
Nickname(s): Tim
Date of birth: same as Teddy’s
Place of birth: London, England
Parents: Jacquel Romanov/Lupin and Fred Weasley
Male or female: male
Magical origins? pureblood
House in Hogwarts: Hufflepuff
First featured in: Teddy Lupin & the Pilfered Progeny
Other facts: Tim came into Hogwarts during the Christmas holidays. He refuses to meet the Weasley family, prefering that of his mother. His younger brother’s name is Jacques.

—–

Full name: Helga Lucas
Nickname(s): none
Date of birth: December 18, 1995
Place of birth: Barcelona, Spain
Parents: Shauna and Myron Lucas
Male or female: female
Magical origins? pureblood
House in Hogwarts: Slytherin
First featured in: Teddy Lupin & the Secret Sister

—–

Full name: Carmen Fay
Nickname(s): none
Date of birth: September 15, 1997
Place of birth: Nottingham, England
Parents: Harold and Rebekah Fay
Male or female: female
Magical origins? muggleborn
House in Hogwarts: Ravenclaw
First featured in: Teddy Lupin & the Secret Sister

—–

Full name: Michael Warrick
Nickname(s): Mickey
Date of birth: April 4, 1998
Place of birth: London, England
Parents: Leroy and Jacqueline Warrick
Male or female: male
Magical origins? muggleborn
House in Hogwarts: Hufflepuff
First featured in: Teddy Lupin & the Secret Sister

Neville Longbottom Jokes

And now for some jokes about Neville Longbottom…

  1. God said, “Let there be light!” and Neville Longbottom walked in.
  2. Neville Longbottom shaves with the sword of Gryffindor.
  3. Neville Longbottom is the reason the Leaky Cauldron got its name.
  4. Justin Timberlake claimed to be bringing sexy back. Neville Longbottom invented sexy.
  5. Neville Longbottom: better than Harry since 1980.
  6. Neville Longbottom doesn’t bowl strikes; he hits 1 pin and the other 9 freak out and die.
  7. Jacob Black thinks he’s the hottest guy on earth; Neville Longbottom is even hotter than him.
  8. Rosa Parks refused to get out of her seat because she was saving it for Neville Longbottom.
    Neville Longbottom can slam revolving doors.
  9. Why did Stephenie Meyer end “Breaking Dawn” the way she did? Well, if she had put Neville Longbottom in the book, the Volturi would have all died upon seeing him.
  10. Neville Longbottom can touch MC Hammer.
  11. Some people say that Neville Longbottom is a coward. Those “some people” are now dead.
  12. Forget Team Edward and Team Jacob; I’m on Team Neville!
  13. Team Neville: because going from coward to badass is cool!
  14. I love Neville Longbottom, because he’s better than Harry Potter.
  15. I love Neville Longbottom, because Harry Potter is an idiot.
  16. I love Neville Longbottom, because killing a snake and earning a fan club is far better than Harry Potter faking his own death and marrying a redhaired stalker fangirl.
  17. Everybody loves Raymond. Everyone except for Neville Longbottom.
  18. Mr. T pities the fool. Neville Longbottom rips the fool’s head off.
  19. Nobody doesn’t like Sara Lee. Except Neville Longbottom.
  20. Neville Longbottom planted the Whomping Willow.
  21. Harry Potter backed down when fighting the Dark Lord. Neville Longbottom charged forward and killed Nagini. Who’s the hero now?
  22. In the Bible, Jesus turned water into wine. But then Neville Longbottom turned that wine into firewhiskey.
  23. Neville Longbottom does not sleep. He waits.
  24. Neville Longbottom did in fact, build Hogwarts in a day.
  25. Google won’t search for Neville Longbottom because it knows you don’t find Neville, he finds you.
  26. When somebody yells “Last one in is a rotten egg,” Neville Longbottom is never the rotten egg.
  27. If you spell Neville Longbottom in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
  28. Neville Longbottom was originally offered the role as Frodo in Lord of the Rings. He declined because, “Only a scaredy-cat would need three movies to destroy a piece of jewelry. I could do it all in one take.”
  29. If you see Neville Longbottom fighting a snake, don’t help Neville, help the snake.
  30. When Bellatrix Lestrange goes to sleep every night, she checks her closet for Neville Longbottom.
  31. Emmett Cullen owns a pair of Neville Longbottom pajamas.
  32. The only thing Charlie Bone, Percy Jackson, and Neville Longbottom can agree on is that Harry Potter killed Cedric Diggory.
  33. M.C. Hammer learned the hard way that Neville Longbottom can touch this.
  34. Neville Longbottom had to confound the Goblet of Fire NOT to choose him.
  35. Threstals can see Neville Longbottom only if someone’s dying.
  36. The only letter in Neville Longbottom’s alphabet soup are B, A, M, F.
  37. When Neville Longbottom was being sorted, the Sorting Hat did not shout “Gryffidor!” Instead, it said, “FUTURE BAD A$$ MOTHER F***ER!”
  38. Neville Longbottom should have been the Boy-Who-Lived; he would have figured out that Professor Quirrell was looking from the sorcerer’s stone, found out that Ginny Weasley had opened the Chamber of Secrets, told the truth about Sirius Black, realized that the Twiwizard Tournament was rigged, THOUGHT before chasing after Sirius, stood up to Umbridge, and realized that Dumbledore was a manipulating, lying traitor who wanted to take over the world.
  39. For Jacquel’s wedding gift, Neville Longbottom gave her the Hogwarts Express. Which was quite impressive because he lifted the entire train and set it up in Italy in one evening.
  40. Yes, it’s Neville Longbottom’s birthday. But the jokes about him are getting old.

The Fandom Chatroom

new-moon-wolf-pack-poster-tribe

Image by aBbYhaLO via Flickr

Charlie Bone (picturetraveler)
Jacob Black (ultimate werewolf lover)
Lyra Belacqua (goldenone)
Neville Longbottom (snakekiller)

*****

Ok, back to the chatroom:

picturetraveler has signed in

picturetraveler: Who wants to chat?

ultimate werewolf lover has signed in

ultimate werewolf lover: Hey, Charlie! How are things going with your last book, apart from the fact that I can’t read it until May?

picturetraveler: OK, I guess. How are things going with that New Moon movie and all?

ultimate werewolf lover: Believe it or not, they say the movie is one of the biggest out there in the world.

picturetraveler: Quil would be so happy to hear that.

ultimate werewolf lover: Yeah, I now. He is beside himself, mocking Harry Potter fans left and right.

picturetraveler: Because he hates Harry Potter.

ultimate werewolf lover: That’s very true.

goldenone has signed in

snakekiller has signed in

goldenone: Hey guys! I saw that New Moon movie…it rocked!

snakekiller: I know. Like there were scores of girls screaming when you first took your shirt off, Jake.

picturetraveler: Really, Neville?

ultimate werewolf lover: Uh, yeah. Like we have a bunch of guys running around without a shirt on…

goldenone: And Edward too.

snakekiller: You just HAD to mention that, didn’t you, Lyra?

sonofagod (Percy Jackson) has signed in

sonofagod: Hey, are you guys Charlie, Jacob, Lyra, and Neville from the Fandom Chatroom?

picturetraveler: Yeah. What are you doing here, Percy?

sonofagod: Well, I just found out that you guys were doing this chatroom thing, so I decided to join up.

ultimate werewolf lover: Really?

sonofagod: Yeah.

—–

Meanwhile in another chatroom…

iwillruletheworld: Did they shut you guys out too?

we’re the best: Yes! Who do those little brats think they are, anyway! We’re the Volturi! We’re the greatest!

iwillruletheworld: Don’t you worry, I’m gonna make them pay for their crap…

The Secret Life of Jacob Black 7

Dumbledore's Army graffiti

Dumbledore’s Army graffiti (Photo credit: Stimpdawg)

(Dumbledore‘s POV)

I am in big trouble here.

The boy’s aunt has a wand pointed at me. She was not afraid to destroy me. And why wouldn’t she be? After all, I DID ruin her life when I allowed her sister Lily to die and I placed little Harry on her doorstep.

But in my defense, she should have never quit Hogwarts in the first place.

But she wasn’t ready to hear my explanations.

“You put a spell on the boy!” she yelled as she zapped me again and again. “I was only able to get him out before my husband and son found out! You better tell my why my nephew is a girl before I destroy you!”

I’m dead now. Might as well bury me next to the Romanov family. But I had been a wizard longer than Petunia was banished from Hogwarts. And it was time for me to put her in her place.

AVADA KEDAVRA!” I shouted, killing the woman immediately. Her husband walked into the room and I ended his life. But the boy who was their son should never know about the fate of his parents.

“OBLIVIATE!”

—–

(Harry‘s POV)

Why on earth was I turned into a girl?

Jacquel had no idea of what had happened to me, but I knew what had happened between myself and Ginny the night after Cedric’s funeral:

“Ginny, for the last time, I’m not interested in you!” I yelled out.

“I knew it!” cried Ginny. “You just want to get into Cho’s pants! Or were you gay for Cedric?”

“No, and no,” I said back. “Now leave me alone and go find Gabriel! I will NEVER be with you!”

That did it. In less than five seconds, I had sealed my own fate. Ginny said, “I do NOT take no for an answer! Mark my words, Harry Potter, you WILL be sorry!” She stormed away before I could get another word from her.

That was that. Ginny Weasley had sent me a potion that turned me into a girl. Only she hid it in some cookies her mother had baked and sent them to me. And I ate them without realizing that the cookies were cursed and the resulting spell was irreversible.

I was a girl for life.

How will I be able to fight the Dark Lord now in my state?

—–

(Unknown POV)

I watched as two girls and two children stood in line, waiting to go to the States.

The States. I haven’t been there in over 50 years, not since I was attacked some years before and left to die. And my adoptive parents were killed by that Michael Calvernstone to boot.

And that bastard is still alive and kicking.

What he doesn’t know is that I’m going to find him and kill him for this act.

But before I do, I shall follow those girls to the States.

—–

(Jacquel’s POV)

Harry frowned as he (I mean SHE) stood next to me. We were in a very long line and that line was to travel to the States.

And the last time I have seen the States was when I was 13 years old and Sean Black had taken us to New York and we saw Broadway. Or rather, he had been asked to perform in a Broadway play; not once had he ever considered filming a movie, nor did he even want to appear on TV.

The line to the International Flights was about 75 people deep and I wasn’t one for patience.

And not only that, security was beefed up after the 9/11 attacks, meaning that even a clever teenager such as myself would have to be extra careful not to give myself away. Because the last thing I needed was to be known as a runaway girl who tried to flee across the Pond to the States.

—–

(Dumbledore’s POV)

With Petunia and that man eliminated and the boy under my control, I had to flee lest that Arabella Figg sees me and…oh crap! She just did!

But the safety of the boy was now in question. I took him and fled to Headquarters. Luckily, no one was there because I did NOT feel like answering to any questions any nosy creature (or Kreacher) had for me.

Now, to see what I could do with him…

I never had a son; the only children I had were Ariana (now dead), Amber (whose loyalty is in question), and Isadora (who disowned me after her mother and stepfather’s deaths). None of them had ever allowed me to see their children.

But all of that would change IF Amber ever decides to settle down and raise a family.

Until that happened, I would have to fully erase any memories the boy had of his former life.

So I said to him, “You are no longer Dudley Dursley; you never were Dudley Dursley at all. Your name is Anthony Leonard Dumbledore and you are my son now.”

Just then I heard voices. Remus Lupin and Sirius Black were here and they were quickly preparing the day’s meal. It was now time for me to present my new “son” to them.

—–

(Jacquel’s POV)

“I now have Jacquelyn Claire Alexandra Ulrich, Jennifer Pamela Sutton, Chandler Alexis Nicholas Sutton, and…” the security guard was reading off our passports.

“Jamie Sidney Evans,” I tossed in quickly, hoping to deter any suspicions about Harry’s true identity.

“Very well then,” said the guard. “Have a safe flight.

We left the line and headed to where the plane was going to be. But who did I chance to see but Draco Malfoy sitting in MY reserved spot, which was by the window so the kids could watch the planes take off and land.

“Well well well, Miss Romanbrat,” Malfoy smirked as soom as he saw me. “So you are running away after all.”

“Just to see an old relative,” I stated.

“I know you’re running away,” he snapped. “And where ever you’re going, I want in!”

Well, what choice did I have? He could easily give me away. So I had to let him join me.

—–

(Unknown POV)

I was now in the area where most of the people were flying to the western side of the States were standing. I watched the exchange between the blond boy and the brown-haired girl with interest. Who were those two kids and why did they appear to be fighting?

I decided to make my move. Once the plane was up in the air, I would have to confront them.

The Secret Life of Jacob Black 4

Children in Khorixas, Namibia

Image via Wikipedia

(Jacquel’s POV)

Damn my life sucks!

Just as you thought that living with a cruel and heartless cousin and being forced to adopt his two children was bad enough, I discovered that my childhood friend Cadwallader Gruven had knocked me up, leaving me pregnant with twin daughters.

TWINS!!!

Not to say that twins don’t run in my family, with me being a twin myself and having two younger siblings as twins. And I used to date one of the Weasley twins.

Until that stupid slut Ginny Weasley ratted me out as a cheater and a whore. WHICH I WAS NOT!!!

Nichollo hasn’t spoken to me since the news regarding my pregnancy got out. I guess he was too upset with himself letting this happen to his only surviving cousin. I didn’t blame him; he had a daughter named Jennifer. Jennifer was his only begotten child, or at least she was until she decided to grow up and marry a man named Saul Cavanaugh without her father’s knowledge nor consent.

Well, due to Jennifer’s unusual baby-like appearance, Nichollo kept her hidden from the world until she was old enough to take care of herself. Which was what happened when Jennifer and Saul married. They had been among those killed in Pettigrew’s attack and their two children, both sons, were given away by their grandmother rather than be given to the grandfather who deserved to raise them more than anyone else.

Which explains a bit why Nichollo was a bit strict with me when I had been a girl in his care.

Anyway, After an entire day of having to spill out the truth about Callie and myself (under VERY heavy pressure from Nichollo) to the proper authorities, I retired to my room and wondered what the future could hold for me. When I got 10 minutes in, Nichollo was in my doorway, holding a letter.

He said, “This just came in from the post office. Did you order something?”

I took the letter from him and it read:

“To Miss Jacquelyn Claire Ulrich,

“You may not know me, but I know you very well; your mother’s name was Irene Romanov. I know that your mother is dead and you are living with someone she doesn’t approve of…”

The letter went on to say that the man’s name was William Black and he was some elder in some Indian nation (Not from India, I hope!) and he was wanting me to come out there and visit him. Yeah, Like I’m going to just throw away my life and go live with some guy I don’t even know.

But then again, I knew that within the next hour, I would have no other choice…