Top 10 Reasons Why Percy Jackson is Better than Harry Potter

Hello, and welcome to another week of top 10 in fandom. I hoped that you enjoyed the last list, because there are some people in this world who are a lot scarier that Lord Voldemort.

Anyway, this week’s topic is the top 10 reasons why Percy Jackson is better than Harry Potter. As we all know, harry potter is a wizard and Percy Jackson is a demigod. Now pit these two against each other and we’re talking a fantasy showdown that won’t soon be forgotten.

Anyway, the top 10 reasons why Percy Jackson is better than Harry Potter are as follows:

10. Percy has a pen that becomes a sword (and he never loses it), but all Harry has is a wooden wand.

9. While Hogwarts may be great, who wouldn’t want to go to Camp Half-Blood?

8. Voldemort is just a messed-up wizard, but Kronos is a huge threat to the entire world.

7. Percy Jackson & the Olympians was hugely inspired by Greek mythology. Not so much with Harry Potter.

6. If there was an underwater fight, Percy would win for sure.

5. In fact, Percy can pretty much hold his own during a fight. I mean, he’s beaten Medusa, a Hydra, and he even squeezed past Luke and retrieved the lightning bolt. What did Harry do, besides maybe yelling “Expeliarmus” a whole bunch of times?

4. You seriously thought that Percy Jackson ripped off Harry Potter?

3. Grover and Annabeth are more loyal to Percy than Ron and Hermione are to Harry.

2. Percy’s story is a bit more exciting than Harry’s boring story.

1. At the end of the day, demigods rule and wizards drool.

Well, that’s all for this list, so I suggest that you set aside Harry Potter and start reading Percy Jackson. If you find yourself disagreeing with any of the above items for any reason, then let me know in the comments. See you next week for more Top 10 in Fandom!

Top 10 Villians who are better than Lord Voldemort

Hello, and welcome to another week of top 10 in fandom. I hoped that you enjoyed the last list, because nothing is better than a good old-fashioned plot twist.

Anyway, this week’s topic is the top 10 villains who are better than Lord Voldemort. I mean, let’s face it: Voldemort is just a noseless freak who makes today’s story book villains look really stupid. I mean, why would you want to be afraid of a wizard who kills himself due to some weak boy wizard’s ineptitude and inability to actually stop him?

OK, enough with the ranting. The villains who are better than Lord Voldemort are as follows:

10. The Joker (from the Batman movies): because nothing is scarier than a man who doesn’t have a plan. Also, why so serious?

9. Loki (from Thor) I mean, Loki would very much take down Voldemort in a fight. plus, remember the Avengers movie?

8. The Volturi (from The Twilight Saga): it’s pretty much safe to say that these guys are the main villains. I mean, they do show up and confront the Cullens on a number of occasions.

7. King Galbatorix (from the Inheritance Cycle): is there anyone worse than a king who wants to take over EVERYTHING, including controlling the dragon riders?

6. Megatron (from Transformers): he’s altogether terrifying and cruel and wants to take over the world.

5. Agent Smith (from the Matrix movies): Nuff said.

4. Valentine Morgenstern (from the Mortal Instruments): his schemes are 10x more terrifying than Lord Voldemort’s nonsense.

3. Kronos (from the Percy Jackson series): a Titan as a villain is terrifying indeed.

2. Darth Vader (from Star Wars): Believe it, he just HAD to be on this list.

1. Sauron (from The Hobbit and the Lord of the Rings): this villain rules them all. Plus, he made that stupid ring.

Well, that’s all for this list. If you find yourself disagreeing with any of the above items for any reason, then let me know in the comments. See you next week for more Top 10 in Fandom!

Top 10 Plot Twists That Would Have Saved a Story

Hello, and welcome to another week of top 10 in fandom. This week, we will be discussing the plot twists that should have been used to save your favorite stories. Whether or not the story would have changed is up for debate.

Anyway, here’s some plot twists that were needed:

10. Charlie Bone & the Hidden King: it turns out that Charlie himself was been working for the other team all along!

9. A Series of Unfortunate Events: turns out, the events of the story were all fictionalized by Lemony Snicket himself.

8. Eragon: Galbatroix attacks way too late and is defeated BEFORE Eragon shows up.

7. Pretty Little Liars: the girls find out that the whole “A” debacle was just for reality TV entertainment.

6. Breaking Dawn: Rosalie chokes to death Purple Wedding Style. (I think that she really needed to go)

5. Harry Potter: the whole story took place in his head.

4. Percy Jackson: Grover or Annabeth are brainwashed by Luke.

3. The Hunger Games: Katniss is the real villain.

2. A Storm of Swords: Michael Bolton performs at the Red Wedding.

1. A Game of Thrones: Tony Stark shows up and saves Ned Stark.

Well, that’s all for this list. If you find yourself disagreeing with any of the above items for any reason, then let me know in the comments. See you next week for more Top 10 in Fandom!

Tales From March 15 2014

Preparing for Divergent

Preparing for Divergent (Photo credit: claireviolet82)

Once again, it’s time for some fun stories that take place on March 15, whereas on that day, Julius Caesar didn’t heed that certain warning and thus, he paid for it with his life.

Anyway, I have a list of stories that will be seen in the near future:

  1. Harry Potter vs. Janette Lennox (and Harry loses!!!)
  2. An alternative ending to “Something Wicked This Way Comes
  3. The “Better Than Harry Potter” group adds several new members
  4. The background characters in the Harry Moffer books get their own story
  5. What if the entire Harry Potter series took place in the head of an autistic boy?
  6. Several characters from several different fandoms are forced to do a play about the Romanovs
  7. Game of Thrones vs. Lord of the Rings (15 rounds of pure insanity!)
  8. “The Spirit Keeper ” becomes a movie, but will it be a hit or miss?
  9. Doctor Mighty gets a theatrical reboot
  10. Jacquel Rassenworth is trapped in the world of “Divergent
  11. Hufflepuffs take center stage
  12. If certain stories were real…(with apologies to Smosh)
  13. The Movie Characters must deal with a dystopian Los Angeles in their latest movie
  14. The Charlie Bone movie is finally released in theaters, but will it succeed?
  15. A fan fiction written according to Count Omer’s Fan Fiction rules.

I’ll have these stories knocked into place soon!

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Fandom Park (The Play)

Anastasia

Anastasia (Photo credit: sabrina ioana)

(Theme song)

Claire Violet Thorpe: Let’s go to Fandom Park and have ourselves a good time…

Kids: Friendly people everywhere, comedy is to share…

Claire Violet Thorpe: Head on down to Fandom Park and plan to stay for a while…

Jacquel Rassenworth: you better be nice to me or I screw up your stories…

Claire Violet Thorpe: Take it to Fandom Park, the place where the magic happens…

Random fan: fan fiction is dumb and people who like it are crazy…(Claire zaps him)

Claire Violet Thorpe: Come on down to Fandom Park and meet some friends of mine!

*****

(The following story deals with Valentine Morgenstern kidnapping several teenagers and forcing them to do a play…)

Jace: This is so unfair! I did NOT ask to be a part of this play!

Valentine: Shut up, Jonathan! You’re doing this play whether you like it or not! Now, the play we are going to do takes place during the last years of Czarist Russia

Isabelle: Pass. (everyone stares at her) I’m not doing that cheap fake Disney version of Anastasia!

Valentine: But this version is better! Much better!

Percy: Really? And how much better is it going to be?

Valentine: It’s going to be a tale of love and passion, a story of duty and pride, a story so powerful, it’ll move you to tears! I call this story…ah, who cares about what I’m calling it, you’re all doing the play! Now suit up, as I have roles for you! Jonathan, you will play the part of the Czar

Jace: Figures.

Valentine: Clarissa, you are the Empress…

Clary: Uh, no I’m not. Can’t Isabelle be the Empress?

Isabelle: Yeah. Let Clary be Anastasia.

Valentine: Whatever. Alec, you’re the Czarevitch. The other girls will play the sisters, that red haired boy will be Leo Trichenberg, those other guys can be the sorcerers…

Jacquelyn: And what about me?

Valentine: Oh, you have the biggest part to play.

Annabeth: And what is that?

Ron: A servant?

Valentine: Neither. She shall play the part of the doomed princess Hadassah Trichenberg.

Jacquelyn: You have got to be kidding me! I’m going to play HER??? Not gonna happen, bub!

Valentine: I say it’s going to happen! Now, get into your costumes and put on your masks, for you will be doing this play!

~I will be turning this one into a fanfiction soon…watch for it!

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New Year, Not So Much Fanfiction

Well, it’s a new year, but I won’t be doing much fanfiction on this blog. I have written fanfiction on there in the past because I was a huge Harry Potter fan, but now that my obsession with Harry Potter is long gone, don’t look for me to be writing (or finishing) any new Harry Potter fan fiction anytime soon. I’ve moved on from that, and so should you.

Anyway, I have completed the story called “Of Demigods and Wizards“, and this fan fiction should be the next big thing. There will be a sequel to the story, so watch for it!

Also, my Twilight fan fiction will be continued, but there are other fandoms that have captured my attention, so expect some fanfiction from those fandoms.

The fate of this blog is in question, as I’m migrating most of my fanfiction to the site The Fantasy Central Channel. That blog will be for stories that are abandoned and want to be finished. I’ll think I’ll deal with that in another blog post.

Well, that’s all! Look for another chapter of “How Bree Tanner Got Her Life Back“, “The True History of the Cullen Family“, and some other stories next week.

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The Demigod Team part 7

The A-Team (film)

The A-Team (film) (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

(the following is a parody of the A-Team)

Announcer: In the year 2010, four demigods were sent to prison for a crime that they didn’t commit. After breaking out of jail, they went underground, where they began their new lives as soldiers of fortune. Still on the run today, they reach out to anyone who needs help. If you have a problem, if there’s no one else who can help you, if you can find them, then you can callthe Demigod Team! (A-Team theme plays)

Starring:

—–

Percy: Well, it’s great to be back at home, where we belong.

Annabeth: Not for long, though. We’ve got a problem.

All: What???

Annabeth: You’ll see…

~~~~

(At a club)

Luke: Shoot…looks like someone did a number on this place!

Thalia: I’ll say!

Percy: So, what happened here?

Grover: According to these ruins, the monster came through that hole and strangled some guy using the victim’s own intestines.

Thalia: Gross!

Annabeth: What we are dealing with here is one sick son of a bitch!

Grover: Yeah.

Percy: Let’s question the witnesses!

~~~~

(Questioning the witnesses)

Luke: Here’s the plan: Percy and I’ll go after the guys while you two go after the girls.

Annabeth: Agreed.

Luke: Good. Let’s go.

***

Annabeth: Now, explain to me again what you saw.

Clary Fray: Uhhh, I saw the monster rise up and strangle some guy. I screamed my head off as I saw some kids killing him.

Thalia: That’s all we need to know. Thank you for your cooperation.

***

Percy: I questioned the guys, but none of them saw anything.

Luke: Darn. I was hoping for a sequel to “Demigods & Wizards”.

Grover: Yeah, I know!

Jace Wayland: So, where’s that pretty one who’s with you?

Grover: You mean Jacquelyn?

Percy: Why is it that every guy here wants to hit on her?

Luke: Yeah, what does she have?

Grover: She doesn’t have a big booty, if that’s what you’re asking.

Jace: Whatever. Where’s the girl? I want to see her.

Percy: Anyone think that is a messed-up version of that part where we got attacked by that hermaphrodite?

Grover: Yeah.

~~~~

Annabeth: So, once again, we’re going to have to call this a draw.

Thalia: Not unless we find out who got killed.

Luke: Yeah, there is that.

Clary: Uh, is this your dead guy here? (points to dead man in the corner)

Percy: Awww, sick! I wish I could un-see that!

Grover: Oh crap! It’s Jaime Lannister! (everyone gasps in horror) How did he get in here?

Thalia: I don’t know. How DID he get in here?

Annabeth: Well, we can’t blame the “A” Team for this one.

Percy: Tyrion isn’t going to like this.

Luke: So, we have another murder mystery to solve: Who killed Jaime Lannister?

~to be continued…

Same Song, Different Tune Part 5

Tyrion Lannister / Game of Thrones

Tyrion Lannister / Game of Thrones (Photo credit: MEDIODESCOCIDO)

Tyrion Lannister & the Demigod Team

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Tyrion was busy pacing the Hands office; it had been a few days since the earthquake had struck the Red Keep, meaning that most of the books had fallen off their shelves.

Something had to give; books didn’t fall off their bookcases and earthquakes usually never happened in King’s Landing. Something had to be going on for that to occur.

Just then, he noticed someone’s shoe lying in a corner of the room. What was a shoe doing here, he thought to himself. Someone was in the Hand’s office, and it wasn’t Ned Stark.

Percy said, “I think we should go back to King’s Landing.”

“Why?” Annabeth cried out.

“Uh, remember that earthquake that we escaped from a few chapters ago?” said Grover. “I think I may have lost a shoe during the quake.”

“Maybe we should go back and retrieve it,” said Luke. “And also, there’s more to that story than we all know.”

The Demigod Team strapped their winged shoes back on and flew towards King’s Landing. Things certainly had changed since they were here last. First off, Westeros no longer had a queen, and King Robert was searching for a new woman to replace Cersei Lannister. Scores of women flocked to King’s Landing, all hoping to become queen.

“This place is a madhouse!” Tyrion overheard Renly complaining to Loras as they surveyed scores of women walking around King’s Landing. “I don’ think that Robert will last much longer in his state.”

“I know,” said Loras. “This is nuts! What some people wouldn’t do to get a Targaryen back on the throne…”

Just then, Percy swooped into the office and retrieved Grover’s lost shoe, only to see Tyrion standing there. “Was that your shoe?” Tyrion cried out. “You must have lost it during the earthquake.”

“No, that’s mine,” said Grover. “Anyway, what’s going on here?”

“King Robert is trying to find a new queen, since his old queens cuckolded him,” said Tyrion. “But I wonder how we’re going to find a queen when there’s so many women willing to kill each other to get the job.”

“Indeed,” said Luke as he and Annabeth came through the window. “This looks like a job for the Demigod Team!”

~to be continued…

 

Tales From March 15

Once again, it’s time for some fun stories that take place on March 15, whereas on that day, Julius Caesar didn’t heed that certain warning and thus, he paid for it with his life.

Anyway, I have a list of stories that will be seen in the near future:

  1. Jacquel, not Harry, jumps the veil and ends up in Forks
  2. The Demigod Team sets off to rescue a kidnapped girl
  3. the Anti-Potter Fantasy Club vs. the “Better Than Harry Potter” group
  4. the Movie Characters deal with paranormal romances in their latest spoof
  5. the Moviewatching Trio reviews non-Disney cartoons
  6. Tyler Potter discovers a movie about him as a wizard and he tries to put an end to it.
  7. the 90s Harry Potter story is written and made into a huge movie while the real Harry Potter movie is ignored
  8. What if “The Spirit Keeper” was published and accepted by the public?
  9. the story about Doctor Mighty (why he succeeded, and why his sidekicks had crappy fan fiction written about them)
  10. the cast of “All in One Friendship” deals with the new story “Magical Compositions
  11. the Teen Rebels and Temmy & Venus (both 2010) go to Comic-Con
  12. Daniel Dickens and his troubles as a male Twilight fan
  13. What if Harry Potter was a girl?
  14. Charlie Bone and his friends prepare to film the movie
  15. A story that deconstructs the unrealistic aspects of the source material and presents it as it might have happened if things were more realistic.

I’ll have these stories knocked into place soon!

The Demigod Team, part 6

Tilda Swinton as Jadis, the White Witch. Her c...

Tilda Swinton as Jadis, the White Witch. Her collar is made from Aslan’s mane, taken during his sacrifice. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

(the following is a parody of the A-Team)

Announcer: In the year 2010, four demigods were sent to prison for a crime that they didn’t commit. After breaking out of jail, they went underground, where they began their new lives as soldiers of fortune. Still on the run today, they reach out to anyone who needs help. If you have a problem, if there’s no one else who can help you, if you can find them, then you can call…the Demigod Team! (A-Team theme plays)

Starring:

—–

Percy: OK, so it’s decided. We go after the “A” Team.

Grover: Yeah. They have pushed us around long enough. Let’s get them!

Thalia: What about me? Do I have a say in this?

Annabeth: Well, technically, this is the “A-Team“, and we usually solve problems that not even the police can solve.

Luke: We have a problem in Narnia.

Annabeth: Such as…

Luke: A group of kids wants us to help them stop a white witch.

Percy: OK then. I say we head off to Narnia!

Peter: Thanks for coming, Demigod Team. We really needed your help. The White Witch wants to make it so that it’s always winter and never Christmas.

Grover: What is she? A grinch?

Percy: Don’t worry, we’ll solve this problem. Surely there has to be a good reason why she hates Christmas.

Annabeth: So, tell us why you hate Christmas.

Jadis: Well, it all began on my wedding day, when everything was great. That was, until my husband walked away from me.

Thalia: Ouch. That’s cold.

Jadis: Ever since that day, I’ve not been very happy. And since Christmas just happened to be our wedding anniversary, I’ve decided to get rid of Christmas.

Annabeth: Wow. How sad.

Thalia: I say we go after the husband and see what his deal is.

Percy: So, you and this woman got married and for some reason, things cooled off between you two?

Aslan: Well, we did fight a lot, especially over some rather unnecessary things, such as visiting the in-laws and magic, stuff like that. I must have hurt her a lot to make her hate Christmas.

Grover: What a douche.

Percy: Grover!

Grover: I was just saying that he didn’t need to fight with her so much. You know what they say, the women are always right.

Luke: And the sooner men accept that, the better.

Edmund: You guys won’t believe this, but Aslan and the White Witch were once married.

Lucy: Really?

Peter: That’s interesting.

Susan: So what happened?

Edmund: They’re not talking to each other right now.

Peter: That’s sad. We need to fix this.

Percy: OK  here’s the plan: We bring them to a neutral setting and have them talk it out.

Susan: Will it work?

Grover: Of course it’s going to work. We’re the Demigod Team. We know how to make things work. (Aslan shows up)

Aslan: This better be good, kids.

Annabeth: You just need to talk to her.

Edmund: This idea is ridiculous! She doesn’t want to talk to him! (Jadis shows up)

Jadis: Oh, is that so? (glares at Aslan) You have some nerve coming here.

Aslan: What about you? (they argue)

Annabeth: Darn. This could take a while.

(For the next few hours, they argue while the kids watch. Finally, Edmund has had enough of the fighting.)

Edmund: WILL YOU TWO CLAM UP??? (Everyone stares at him) Why are you guys fighting? Don’t you love each other?

Aslan: Well…

Lucy: You shouldn’t be fighting, that’s not right. Maybe instead of this war, you should kiss and make up.

Jadis: Should we?

Everyone: YES!!!

Aslan: Well, I suppose I could pay more attention to her emotional needs. Women have needs that must be met, and if the man doesn’t meet his wife’s needs, then there’s no point in being married.

Lucy: OK…

Jadis: Well, I kind of forgot why we were fighting in the first place, and this is what happens if you keep fighting without reaching a compromise.

Lucy: We did it! Thanks, Demigod Team!

Aslan: Not so fast, you guys! (everyone freezes) First, you have to do something for me.

Percy: Say what now?

Jadis: Part of the deal, kid. You helped us, now you must do something for us.

Percy: But this is the part where the show ends and I say, “I love it when a plan comes together!”

Everyone: Sure you do, Percy.